What If My Spouse Is Resistant to Prepping?
Those of us married folks know that when we’re on the same page with our spouse regarding a particular issue, things run much more smoothly around the home. When two people stand as one, it creates harmony and makes everything better.
On the other hand, the more topics on which we and our spouse disagree, the more potential there is for friction, arguments, hard feelings and a toxic atmosphere that poisons everything around the house.
One of the issues that many spouses do not agree on is prepping. If one spouse believes it’s a good idea to be prepared for a variety of negative scenarios but the other thinks that it’s unnecessary, there are going to be plenty of unpleasant discussions on the subject. The prepper won’t be happy with how irresponsible the non-prepper is. The non-prepper will believe that the prepper is paranoid and is wasting money that could be used for something they need more immediately.
If this is the case for you, I’m going to assume you’re the prepper. Otherwise, you probably wouldn’t be reading this blog. And maybe it’s not your spouse who disagrees with you, but rather an adult child or another relative. Whoever it is, you could push your agenda on them – which you’ve probably already discovered just makes things worse – or you could try to educate them more subtly.
One advantage you have is that prepping has become much more mainstream than it used to be – even over the past 10 years. Katrina, Sandy and a variety of other severe weather events have left millions of people without power for anywhere from a few hours to several weeks. It’s common knowledge that those who were prepared with emergency food and water supplies were much better off than those who weren’t.
Your spouse or other family member should be willing to at least have a 72-hour supply of essentials stockpiled, so start with that. Over time you can build it up without a lot of fanfare. Don’t preach about preparedness, but don’t be hesitant to show them examples of how people benefited by being prepared.
Here’s another idea. Figure out what products they use on a regular basis, and then buy them in bulk and keep them out of sight in the basement. When you hear them complaining that they’ve run out of something, go downstairs and get it for them with a comment such as, “If the stores were closed right now, you would still have what you need only because it’s stockpiled here in our home.”
Next, buy a few items that even the most resistant family member can’t fault you for, such as a fire extinguisher and a roadside emergency kit. This will plant a psychological seed that being prepared for an emergency is a smart thing to do.
Finally, if you are one of the heads of the household, you have to do what’s right for your family, even if no one agrees with you. You don’t have to go overboard, but you have a responsibility to take care of those who have been entrusted to you. If an emergency occurs and you can pull out what everyone needs, you’ll be a hero. And even if that emergency never occurs, eventually they will understand that you were looking out for their good.
Do you have a minimum of 72 hours’ worth of supplies should a crisis occur? That’s a first step everyone should take, regardless of what other family members think about it.
I’m the prepper and my husband had a fit when I bought the water purifier. So I knew to be extra careful with what I got next. I had to send my dried food to my friend’s house and pick it up on the sly. Then when I got it home, I put it under the beds and in the closets and used trash bags to block out what they actually were. I keep our canned goods that we usually buy anyway ahead of when we need it. When he questioned me on it then I said that because we are on special diets then I want to buy ahead so we don’t run out. Since he gets afraid that we will run out then that is a good argument. Also the 25 year foods are good because I don’t have to use it now and can give it away to someone if I need to..
Remove all thefood in the house,shut off
The water at the meter, then tell you unwilling
Spouse that a disaster just hit, (TURN OFF
The power too, now what are we going to
Do? No food , water, or power. IN about
12 hrs your spouse wiil have a major change
Of attitude, if not tell your spouse to pack up
And leave, you are responsible for your own
Survival and safety.
I keep hearing that you should have an air rifle on hand. HOW is that going to be protective? OR is there something I am “missing” something?
It doesn’t hurt to has a stash of fuel with a preservative added for power outages. Does anyone notice that “at the same low prices” the packages are shrinking at an alarming rate. Stock up now on essentials. Don’t wait, tomorrow may be too late!
8750 Watt generators are on sale right now at Harbor Freight for only 539.00; comparables at other stores are starting at 999.00! :) Just wanted to let you know
Dear Frank,
This is an excellent topic of discussion and we are addressing it as you have here, but with more detail, in the book we are now writing SURVIVAL 2.0 – Major Disaster Survival.
It is a follow up to our book SURVIVAL 101-HOW TO BUG OUT AND SURVIVE THE FIRST 72 HOURS, available to all through you and Power 4 Patriots!!!
Another tip for getting the family on board is to lovingly “enlist their help”. Your spouse, children and others all have talents. Ask them to help you with your prepping, even when the tasks are things you could do alone. As you work together they usually begin to get it.
Examples: Have those with DIY skills help you build shelving for food and supplies or other construction needs. Take your teen girls with you when shopping for roughing it clothes. Ask those who are “techies” for help with emergency communications selection, etc.
Always involve children in your own learning experiences regarding desperation cooking, shelter building, hunting, fishing and gathering or animal husbandry. They will love the time shared with you and will suck up information like a sponge.
Make a pleasant family outing while scouting multiple evacuation route and re-group planning.
Arrange for the whole family (10 and older) to attend a Red Cross Basic First-Aid Class together and so on.
God Save America and protect our troops!
Your Friend,
Orrin
Orrin
I am the wanna be prepper. We have a 72 hr food supply and maybe a little more because I do stockpile a good deal on canned food. My husband is so so in that he doesn’t argue with me when I tell him I want to turn one of the rooms into a safe room with our survival supplies but I know he’s just humoring me. My grown son lives with us and he is definitely on board but it’s his room that I want to turn into the safe room so I have to wait until he moves out. I did just buy the Power4Patriots package and I’m looking forward to seeing if I can understand it. Maybe if I can build a solar panel by myself my husband will get on board. Would love to only pay $1 a month for electricity like Cliff A.
Thank-you Susan for the shout out; but you should thank Frank. I do. It was his http://www.power4patriots that set me on the right track. As for food storage, I too had that problem whereby someone was still living at home when we were about to convert their bedroom to a storage area. What I used instead was several unused closets in the house. Start small then build upon it. We also met other people that can their own fruits. What we did was to organize and share what we can. Someone had pears, someone else had apples, another cherries and so on. This year I had a bumper crop of cucumbers and I caned pickles. All kinds of pickles in different ways to meet the needs of others taste. I also had jalapenos, green beans and tomatoes. We exchanged them for peaches, pears, peas and other stuff. An even swamp all around made it fun and sociable. And if we ran out of trading goods you can purchase some at a sever discount than what you would get at any store. Again, Thank-You and good luck.
You have described my wife to a T. We prepped for Y2K with several thousands of dollars worth of 5 yr food supplies. At the end of yr 4, gave most to church and some to friends who could use the large tins of food before it spoiled on them. She now wants to just hold on to our remaining savings, that I know the worlds countries are trying to destroy it’s worth, Re: The Death of Money by James Rickards. I try to explain to her where this and other countries are going, she doesn’t understand how dire the situation is. Not only that but we have riots in our state that last months brought on by instigators and troublemakers from other states just to exacerbate the problems. I am starting a program in our small subdivision, 48 homes but only 12 full time families, our own water system with back up propane generator. But there stands the wife with the ” just shoot me ” attitude. Makes me crazy!
Well, I ‘ll tell you, my Grandfather use to tell me about the Great Depression and rough it was on him and the family. You see, he was the one that was suppose to be the breadwinner of the family. When he stayed with us, he would show us how he would re-purpose various items into something that was 180 degrees from what they were intended for. A lot of the items were ingenious. I’m sorry to say that I could never would have thought about how to re-purpose various items. My grandfather use to say that I was only limited by my imagination.
When I joined the Army, it was then that my grandfather’s lessons kicked in; especially when I went overseas and had limited materials but a greater need of things that could and would make my life a little bit easier for me and my troops.
Upon my return to the States, things calm down a bit. I lived in a State where recycling was very big. Bottles, aluminum cans, newspapers and excreta. I did what I could to help the environment, until one day I started to ask questions. That is when I discovered that I was helping the garbage company by supplying them with my hard earned recycling goods where they made a profit by turning them in for themselves. Why should I give away my money for free? So the bottles, cans and glass jars that I had collected, I started to turn in for my own profit. Now everyone is doing it, especially with the last 8 years and economic downturn. My neighbors came over to shoot the breeze and I offered them a beer. They gladly accepted my beer and literally ran home with the empty bottle so that they can collect the $0.05 when they turned in their own bottles and cans. I guess everything was tight for everyone.
Then one day I was looking on the internet and came across Frank’s Power4Patriots. You can check it out here, power4patriots.com. He taught me that I could become self reliant by building my own Solar panels and go off the power grid and save a lot of money. I did and have saved a lot of money. My electric bill is $1.00 a month, $12.00 a year – with the AC running.
I have reading Frank’s blogs and I have expressed my point of views on them. I have always tried to look for the positive in things. I have also express some negative in things as I have seen or experienced. In any case, I have always spoke the truth and tried to point the way for others to follow so that you fine folks wouldn’t have to reinvent the wheel. I mean that is why we are here, right?
Well, my wife and I do not really see things eye to eye when it comes to my prepping. I’m the saver in the family. If you give me a dollar, I will still have the same dollar.
Thanks to Frank’s insight and my past background; I see the handwriting on the wall. It tells me that we all must start to save and store our supplies while we can. Because when the rainy day does come it isn’t going to just drizzle, but, it is going to flood. If you are not careful you are going to either drown in the flood waters or float down the river in the rescue raft that you have made for yourself and your family. What do I mean? Well, like I told my wife a few years back, the USA is going to go through an economic upheaval. Then I told my wife next will be some screwed up weather to contend with. Then I told her about the the food shortage and the higher prices, and then the American currency will become over inflated.
Well my friends, I was correct about the economic down turn. I was right about the weather. California, Texas, Oklahoma, Florida, Georgia and other southern states experiencing 3 plus more year droughts. This drought has effected the crops in the United States. It has forced the country to rely on South American countries for this country’s food sources, this also includes Mexico. A lot of our hard earned dollars have gone south of the boarder and we are not going to see this money for a very long time to come. With crops yields dropping but the prices are increasing and the drought in America, the cattlemen, pig and hog farmers going to have to cut back on their stock. It cost more to feed them than to raise them. Then there was a virus affecting the hog farmers stock; whereby, they had to destroy their animals or contaminate the food supply. (A chicken farm in Idaho was destroyed because of avian flu just last year.) It will take at lease 2 years for the farmers to repair the drought damage to their crops, 2 to 3 years for the cattle and hog herds to make a comeback. Yet, you will still see $8.00 to $12.00 per pound of beef and $6.00 to $8.00 per pound for pork. You don’t believe me? Go to McDonald or any other fast food restaurant and order food for two and see if it doesn’t cost you close to $15.00 to $20.00 bucks. Better yet, for to the grocery store and see if it doesn’t cost you $2.00 to $4.00 per item. So you need to conserve your finances by making due with what you have. Learn to make what you could buy. Learn to cook from scratch than use process foods. Plant your own garden even if it is only a few tomato plants. It is better to save a few bucks than to spend a few bucks on something you could have grown yourself.
Then there is inflation. The past 8 years of economic down turn has affected us one and all. This is where you are still being paid the same low wages while your employer is trying to increase his/her profit margin at your expense. Haven’t you notice how the cost of living has increased every year whereas you income has not. When was the last time you got a raise? Are both you and your spouse working? A lot of families still only have one person bring in the money and it isn’t daddy.
So, saving and preparing is the only way a family can and will survive. You can’t depend on the government to bail you out, you can’t expect the government to come to your aid because they are the cause of your dilemma. You can only count on yourself and your family. For the past few years, I have been prepping and saving while my wife has been digging in her heals and griping every step of the way. Even when I have pointed out to her that our freezer is full of meat, our shelves are stocked with fruits and vegetables that we have grown ourselves, thanks to Frank’s SurvivalSeeds4Patriots.com and others that have shared their ideas.
I have forced my wife to write down everything that she had used during the week that she had used from our stored goods so that they can be replenished and restocked with new and fresh goods. That goes for the batteries, medical supplies, oil for the car and gasoline too plus other hard stocked items. It is cheaper to replace small quantities than it is to reinvent the wheel from scratch. When the power goes out, we will still have power. When the food prices get too expensive, we will have our stored goods. Our supplies is and are for me and my family. You will never know when some disaster natural or man made may come along. We will be ready. Just a thought – – – I wonder what those people that were affected by the recent snow storms are thinking or saying about the recent blizzard conditions in February and March? I bet they wish that they were better prepared instead of paying through the nose for food, fuel, supplies and services.
As for my wife – well, she will always gripe about something, especially when it comes to my prepping. I think it is the only way that she is truly happy. I know she is going to slap me upside the head for saying this. However, it is funny to see her smile when she can come up with some item(s) that another person did not or could not get for themselves because that didn’t save for it. (Bacon comes to mind.)
All I can do is to carry on. When it is too hot, my wife will enjoy her AC, when food prices are too high and expensive; she will already have them in mason jars in storage or can goods on the shelf. I have my garden in the back yard and you kind folks and Frank to turn to should I need some help or guidance, after all, we are all in this together. It is about time that we count our blessings and start helping ourselves. It is better to assist others when you are squared away than to be in the same situation as they are in. This way you will know how much help you can provide without compromising yourself or your family’s needs .
yes, my wife just wants to stick her head in the sand and not worry about when the SHTF…I am going to buy a container of food from Frank or Chef’s choice–don’t know which one yet….also need to buy more guns and ammo….I have long rifles and pistols….never enough though….
Bear in mind that you can generally only shoot one gun at a time. However…one or two of several caliber is not a bad choice. Just don’t over do it….
I would highly recommend an air rifle. The type that shoots 22 Cal pellets. When ammo comes in short supply an air rifle will come in handy. You can find more ammo for an air rifle than you can for a powder and shot weapon.
As for getting food from either Frank’s http://www.foodforpatriots.com or Chef’s choice; i would recommend http://www.foodforpatriots.com. Frank is quite right when he said that it is delicious and he has a great variety to temp any finicky eaters, like small children. When my grandkids come over for the weekend, they insist on eating Frank’s Food for Patriots instead of grandpa’s cooking and I’m a good cook too. It taste that good!